Thursday 23 July 2009

Statististatics

The boffins o’er at the Larne Skool o’ Economics hiv bin conductin’ mair research, published fur the yinst time taeday. By coincidence they wur o’er in Scotland at the same time as messel, but hiv used thar statistical skills tae make a much mair in depth study o’ the fowk o’ Glasgow an’ Belfast than ah cud iver hiv managed. Until noo, ah hid thunk thit the main similarities betwain the twa populaces wis thit they both regard a rake o’ chicken an’ mushroom pot noodles as an exotic family meal, but it turns oot thars lat mair than thy’on.

The full findins kin be foun’ o’er at the Ulster Akademic an’ Research Executive.

Car

Mainwile the McWilliamses are preparin’ tae git a new auld motor, yin which will allow hersel tae terrify even the hardiest motorist. Ah will report nixt week.

1 comment:

Fat Sparrow said...

It's amazing, the similarities between both Belfast and Glasgow and my Southern California ghetto.

Some differences: I have no idea what the types of drinks you have listed are, over here it would be Colt 45 and Boone's Farms. It never rains here (and it was 105 F last weekend), so raincoats are not needed. When it does sprinkle, everyday life comes to a complete halt and and all the TV shows are pre-empted so that they can do news shows about how it is raining (really, I'm not kidding). Girls here not only have their giblets hanging out of their skirts, they have them hanging out of their shorts, too, and camel toe is endemic.

It's kind of reassuring, in a way. Now I know that things will not be as strange as I thought when I move over. Well, other than that here, white people are the minority, and over there, my Spanish will be useless.

Do Belfast and Glasgow have a high proportion of people with neck and face tattoos? Nothing says "I am a high class person of society" like a neck or face tattoo.